Stimulus Plan...Not That Stimulating

Now I know for a fact that there are a lot of you out there yelling at me right now. Saying things like:

"You're not supposed to talk about anything serious"

"Don't remind us of how bad things are right now!"

"Aaaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhh"

I hate to break it to you....but being in college means the economy effects my life too, so I can't COMPLETELY ignore the fact that our country is in the crapper.

And besides, it's not like I'm boring. If I can be interesting enough to get a few people to read about important issues today, then

Kudos
to
me.

I'm sure many of you have heard about Obama's idea.

It's NEW

It's AWESOME

It's THAT AND A BAG OF CHIPS

IT'S...........

OBAMA'S STIMULUS PLAN!!!! (Fanfare can be heard playing)

If you haven't heard of this, well then you should probably turn on the TV....or just check your empty wallet.

That echo you hear as you yell into your piggy bank? That's the sound of CHANGE

I'm a big Obama supporter, I'm a liberal all the way. But I am not a Change Zombie who follows him around repeating the phrase "Yesss weee caaannn...Yessss weee caaannn".

Lightbulb!!

Just because it's Obama's plan, doesn't mean it's going to work. Crazy Right??

Basically Obama is trying to get the economy pumping by pushing this 825 Billion Dollar Project.

- (Born from FDR's idea in the Great Depression)

Now 275 Billion Dollars is going to be passed out in the form of..........

TAX CUTS!!!!!

YAAAYYY!!!! .....too bad it won't work

The idea is to get people buying stuff so that companies don't go belly up, and people don't lose their jobs. The only problem is that people are going to use this money to pay things like bills and loans...and not TVs and Cars...which is what needs to happen.

So that plan goes down the tubes.

BUT WAIT!!!!!

What about the other money??

Well that's going on big infrastructure projects...we're talking the fixing of

• Buildings,
• Roadways, and
• A bunch of other stuff.

The idea behind this is that all of this will create new jobs for people and places to spend money.

Here's the kicker.

This will create some great jobs for ALL the people who know how to operate jackhammers and mix cement.

Awwwwww......Too bad that the other 99% of the population who aren't welders are going to be left out.

And if people think it's going to cover anywhere near the 3 million jobs that were lost in the past year...they're lying to themselves. Good Job America.

It's the biggest government spending project in "The History of the World!!"

.....and it's a joke

At some point these trillions of dollars are going to have to be paid back...so hang on to your wallet, because it's probably going to take a generation to do it. And for those of you who need that explained to you.......that's you.

You see....it's critical that Obama's plan be focused more on the root of the problems. This is

housing market,

consumer buying,

and jobs.

And instead of coming up with a good plan, he was rushed into a quick decision to try and show America that he's going to Instill Change.

So he did what any politician would do....he took more money than anyone could afford and shoved it into a plan that won't work.

Now I am not a "glass is half empty" kind of guy...I know full well that we have many more years with Obama...and who knows, maybe he'll surprise us all.

All I'm saying is we're not off to a very good start.

We thought the problem couldn't get worse after Bush was gone.....

TADA!!!!

Next time I'll probably be funnier...don't you worry


Talk to ya later!